nerdy spiritual.

Friends.

It's 11:20 at night. I squirted strawberry milkshake into my right eye, leaving me with a fuzzy field of vision, and raccoon eyes from the smeared eye liner. After four days in a hotel, I'm having trouble remembering where we keep the water glasses in my apartment, and I've mislaid my toothbrush in one of the many still-packed bags at the foot of my bed. My mother is alive and safely back in Chicago, so that's a bonus--but my roommate and I got to talking so I haven't called her to let her know I made it home safe, so I know I'll hear about that tomorrow. Probably from the police first, at my door after she called to report me as a missing person. I have to teach the statistics students in 9 hours, but I have no idea where our stats text is. God only knows where my Bible is, and I wish He'd give me a vision of it, because I could use a good Word.

Most of all, I just need to talk.

I hate to be that girl who goes to a church conference and comes out all nerdy spiritual, but...

So much happened. I feel like I've left something behind, and moved into something new. And I'm terrified. Like, scared enough to turn back, to try to get back whatever comfortable safety I had. To pretend as though I didn't worship openly. Didn't promise more.

More to come.