happy anniversary to us.

Today is the one-year anniversary of the best sermon ever written.

I know what you're thinking. Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God was written like, 250 years ago. But with all due respect to the memory of Jonathan Edwards, he was just out-shined. It happens. I used to have the prettiest hair in my peer group, and then I met Natalie. Such is life.

So, today is the one-year anniversary of the best sermon ever written, and in honor of this auspicious occasion, I'd like us to meditate on one line from said sermon. (If you're interested, its title is "God Chose You!", delivered by Lindell on a Wednesday night prayer service at James River.)

Towards the end of the immaculately-organized specimen of Word-ed wonder, Lindell says "And tonight, you might not understand what is going on in your life, but that does not mean that God is not in control."

Excellent, right? Don't you just want to listen to the whole thing? Email me, I'll hook you up. (Oh! Or maybe we can have a super-fun people party, and listen to it together!)

It was this sermon, and that idea, that began to shift my thinking away from rigid adherence to knowledge. I had been pushing so hard against atonement--how does it work? I asked myself again and again. I felt like I was just banging my head against the wall, sometimes begging God to help, to give me something--anything--that would make it all make sense. But this sermon, and that idea that my confusion is no indicator of God's presence, changed me. I began to slowly understand that God is God regardless of whether or not I understand Him.

My life is proof! I've never understood Him. I've searched, and asked, and begged, and cried, and prayed. And somehow through all of that, even in the moments when I thought I was acting completely outside of a system with God, He was guiding me. I didn't understand, but God was in control.

Because of that sermon, I chose to attempt the belief that though I don't understand the greater metaphysics of exactly how I am saved, that God is still a good God. I chose to live with the ambiguity of election.

So I look forward, and I think that I don't understand all of this. I don't know how it's going to work. I mean, really, who am I, and where am I going, and what will happen now? But maybe, just maybe--

I don't understand what's happening in my life, but God is completely in control.