reality check.

I'm so completely taken with His power. With the absolute reality of God.

Sometimes, my thoughts about God can be a little...academic. I believe in Him. I love Him. But I don't think I always fully understand Him. (Who does?)

So last week was really something else.

I talked to a stranger about Christ. And afterward it occurred to me--she was so perfectly pitched to my area of knowledge, and heart. Even if I'd doubted the voice that told me to speak to her, even if I'd said that I was just imagining that, making it up, I couldn't have made up how incredible it was that I'm exactly the kind of person to whom she would listen. And I just happened to be sitting there. And because I listened to that possibly-imagined voice, we had a conversation that she might never have otherwise had.

In that moment of realization, I shook, quite literally. Because I realized that God is real. Friends, He doesn't need my weak academic arguments, and logical proofs. He is real, and terrifyingly powerful, and surely, my sins are forgiven.

He's real.

Sometimes, I start to worry that my prayers are in vain. That I'm just playing make-believe in church. Doing whatever I can to make the world seem more comfortable.

But last week, I prayed for a book, on the heels of a weekend that left my faith rocked and uncertain, and I got a book about people of faith coming from my hometown, actually coming through the church at which I first learned of Christ. I know that sounds silly, but when I realized, when it occurred to me that this book was more than just something interesting--I dropped it. Like a hot potato. Because what are the chances? Because I don't physically hear the voice of God, but when I see Him working so specifically, so close to me...I'm terrified. God is real.

I see things like that, and I think that nothing is impossible. That this is all real. That what these people are saying is true. That I have nothing to fear. Because He is real.

If He weren't real, it would foolish to go to seminary. To give generously. To pray ardently. To love lavishly. To live in discipline. But since He is real, I've seen it now, those things not only live far from foolishness, but very, very close to necessity.

He's real.