healed.

A funny thing is happening.

I'm coming to myself in the middle of a busy day, and realizing that I'm not a visitor to Christianity.

I'll be walking up the stairs, or cooking dinner, or taking a shower. Then it hits me. I'm done surveying. I'm in this. I believe in Christ as my savior. I ask God to keep me close, and I believe that there is His spirit moving through my life.

And I wait for the doubt. I wait for a moment of trepidation, or the thrill of a role played so well.

But no dice.

What I get instead is excitement. I get this surge of joy. I smile to myself, and to God, and thank Him for knowing me so well, and I think--how do I share this with other people?

It's a bizarre sensation. The year made all the difference.

I can't believe that I'm out of the woods of tumultuous faith. But am I?

Certainly, doubt will come and go, but in the rough psychology of conversion, I think I've been healed.