exodus from fear.

Peeps, I hit the jackpot. Fo shizzle.

That is...friends, I have been extravagantly blessed. Seriously.

I was in Tim Keene's office this afternoon, and I thought, "I could spend days just sitting here, listening to this man tell stories, and talk about his relationship with God." My whole soul smiled, and I thanked Him.

Later, I was sitting in another office at JRA, looking at a seemingly endless list of attender names on a computer screen, when I heard, "Pray for them." And so I prayed for them, name after name after name. And I thought, "Who gets the opportunity to pray specifically for the body like this?" And I thanked Him.

Later still, I was at home, living the perfect Friday night, reading a book I'd been wanting to read (a signed copy! signed copies--such a nerdy pleasure), and as I read, I suddenly felt the deepest sensation of contentedness. And I thanked Him.

It has been a thankful day. Yet, as wonderful as those things all are, as pleasurable as an afternoon chat with Tim, an amazing opportunity to serve, or a great book, I hit the jackpot.

I was reading in Exodus yesterday, where God is telling Moses how Aaron's threads should be made, and it says that the plate of his garment was to be engraved: "Holy to the Lord." Immediately I thought, "Wow, that's a brick ton of responsibility. Holy to the Lord. Lot to live up to." I imagined that I would be so intimidated by such a designation literally displayed on me. Being holy to the Lord: tall order.

Then I realized. I am holy to the Lord. That's a gift. That's grace. I was made holy to Him when I said yes, and am made so continually as I seek Him in humility.

I've been really caught up lately in myself. In how I'm not "Christian enough" for this or that--for approaching the altar, for worshiping in whatever way I want, for taking part in church life, for applying to seminary. It doesn't make much sense, I won't try to explain it here. But, when I read that verse, I remembered who I am. Who He made me.

I am a girl made holy to the Lord. A girl redeemed. A girl set free. Free to worship, free to take her place in the body, free to follow His call, no matter where that leads.

I am Holy to the Lord.