i figured it out, you were right here all along

I think I just started grieving, post-cancer.

I was talking to my best friend about how I wish my boyfriend would become my fiancee, and in a hurry.  She said something very true: "Months is nothing compared to your whole life."  And then I said something very true: "Months is a lot after repeatedly hearing them describe your life span."

And then I started crying.