mighty in me. and in you.

I'm up early, taking meds to get a jump start on any of the expected symptoms of my chemo--today is supposed to be the bad day. I decided yesterday that it would not be.

Anyway, as I'm awake, drinking an energy supplement, and a boatload of water, and downing pills, I'm taking the time to read and respond to some of the many wonderful Facebook messages people are leaving for me.

And I'm crying.

At first, I thought I was crying from fear, or sadness. "Oh, I have cancer," would come to mind, as you read. But in my heart, I realized--I'm crying because I'm so grateful to God for what He's providing. So many wonderful people, so wonderfully willing to reach out and to offer well-wishes, and prayers, and support. It's overwhelming, and humbling, and undeserved. (Say what you want--it's entirely undeserved.)

Let me give you an example. A couple of days ago, I received an incredibly encouraging email from a friend of my Dad's. I've known the guy since I was a child, but we've never been particularly close, so as I read the words of this near-stranger, I cried openly--they were so raw, and wonderful, and powerful. "[Jesus] is mightier in you, more than you know," closed the letter, and that simple encouragement, that powerful reminder that there are those around me who know Christ better than I do, who have lived longer with Him, who can tell me with assurance that Jesus is mighty in me! That He is so much mightier than I can now know! That is some stuff! I felt blessed. Encouraged. God is so good.

As a sidebar, my Dad later told me a story of how the night that his friend heard of my illness, his prayer group was slated to be canceled, but the guy called his friends, and said no--we have something to pray about. And so somewhere in the cold, snowiness of northern Wisconsin, a group of stranger set about praying for me, a nothing in Christ 700-something miles away.

That's so humbling.

So...part of this process is thankfulness, or what you might call extreme gratefulness. God is providing what I couldn't dare provide for myself. I can't rally people towards me, but God has done so quickly. I can't give them the right words to speak, but He must whisper to their hearts.

It is humbling, but also glorious, to need. I'm glad to be learning this now. So that I might give that much more powerfully.